Saturday, March 11, 2017

Sunday, March 5, 2017

WWE Fastlane Preview


It's been a couple weeks over a year now, but Fastlane was the first event I wrote about on the Brief so I'm considering this my anniversary blog and will use that as extra motivation while writing this. It's basically like I'm playing on my birthday, absolute lock for a home run with an over/under of incorrect picks set at 0.5. I recommend you hammer the under.

It seems like this isn't really an unpopular opinion anymore, but Raw is starting to become the shittier show compared to Smackdown. Obviously Raw still has the better roster with more depth in terms of top stars. But storyline wise, Smackdown is blowing them out of the water. Smackdown almost has that feel from when I was 12 with deeply woven storylines, while Raw is still obsessed with the Authority angle that's been running for three years now. But it does have some room for something great and tonight will give a great sense of direction for it.

Let's check out the card.

Kick Off Show

Rich Swann & Akira Tozawa vs. The Brian Kendrick & Noam Dar

Bro I didn't even know this was a match. I know Brian Kendrick is a dickhead who has been attacking Tozawa and I will always pick the faces in a kick off match, so let's ride with that.

Prediction: Swann & Tozawa


Sasha Banks vs. Nia Jax

Everything about this screams a Sasha Banks win. She is the prodigal daughter of Boston, she is a face of the women's division who always gets her win back, and Nia Jax has absolutely demolished her these past few weeks. But I refuse to believe that Nia Jax will suffer her first lost at a PPV like Fastlane. No thanks.

So as long as there is a clean finish..

Prediction: Nia Jax


Gallows & Anderson (c) vs. Enzo & Cass -- Tag Team Championships

I have legitimate pride for the rebuild of The Club. They were dead in the water after a failed comedy career but now stand atop the tag division. Beautiful. But now they face a challenge going up against Enzo & Cass, two of the biggest crowd favorites in the company.

But the thing is, those two have never held the titles at any level between NXT and the main roster, and are a tandem that can handle a loss, especially with the belts on the line.

You have to give Gallows & Anderson some more burn with the belts and wait until at least Mania for them to drop them. Give Enzo & Cass the win in Orlando's NXT heavy crowd. 

Prediction: Gallows & Anderson retain


Neville (c) vs. Jack Gallagher -- Cruiserweight Championship

Let my man Neville eat forever. Guy is Puppa to every cruiserweight right now and I don't want it to stop. Gallagher is cold as fuck but his time can come when Neville ever decides to retire. Maybe he'll do a fresh umbrella trick.

Prediction: Neville retains


Samoa Joe vs. Sami Zayn

These guys have worked together in the past and it was underwhelming when you consider how big of a match this seems like. But that was in NXT, and we're in the big leagues now buddy. 
If you're into watching people die in real time, then tune into this match cuz it will be an absolute wash and a half. Samoa Joe was called up to kill people and I'm pretty sure Sami Zayn has a clause in his contract where he isn't allowed to win matches. Easy pick.

Prediction: Samoa Joe


Bayley (c) vs. Charlotte Flair -- Women's Championship

Charlotte has never lost a singles match on a PPV and the Women's Championship is a legitimate red hot potato. I think WWE fucked up having Bayley win on Raw and not at Mania, but I'm sure they have a planned direction to follow that won't be cool at all. Let's see Charlotte extend her streak and then lose the belt on Raw tomorrow.

Prediction: Charlotte


Roman Reigns vs. Braun Strowman

Listen, I know where this is heading, and I don't like it one bit. My biggest fear is that Braun Strowman has had this dominant build just to be handed off the Roman Reigns to give him a big win heading into his Mania match with Undertaker. Mark my words, I will puke on myself if Braun Strowman loses clean. But that's where Taker comes into play. I don't think there is a fucking chance Roman Reigns wins this one. Whether it's a no contest, or a Strowman win, I think Taker comes in and fucks Roman Reigns' day up. I truly think that this match will spill to the outside of the ring and more and end up being a draw, but for the sake of a prediction and my hatred of Roman Reigns, I need to see Strowman pin that man.

Prediction: Braun Strowman


Kevin Owens (c) vs. Goldberg -- Universal Championship

I am so against this Goldberg run. I think I've made it clear that I'm a big Owens guy, and I truly despise part timers, especially when two of them will be main eventing WrestleMania, but here is my theory.
There are too many possibilities for an interference not to have one, I will list them..

1. Brock Lesnar attacks Goldberg

Lesnar has been sonned by Bill too many times now to not fuck him out of a championship opportunity. Could he come in and cost him the match?

2. Chris Jericho

Jericho hasn't been on TV since he was taken out by Owens at the Festival of Friendship and this isn't a situation where he just returns on a normal Monday Night Raw. So does he come out and cost Owens the belt? Or does he attack him for a DQ? A disqualification would be a weird move in a main event, so I don't know about that. But one thing that has stuck with me, is that at the FoF, Y2J was very adamant with saying that Owens WILL beat Goldberg, and despite the break up, I feel as if that still carries come legit weight. Call me crazy..

3. Triple H/Samoa Joe

As random as it might be, you have to remember that Triple H did hand Owens the Universal Title, and there hasn't been much of a follow up from that. 

In his last promo on Raw, KO really emphasized how this will be the evolution of Kevin Owens, and as deep as I might be looking into it, could he have been hinting at a new age version of Evolution with Triple H and Samoa Joe? Definitely a Besse's Bold Prediction Brought to you by Butterfinger, but crazier things could happen so give it a chance.

Regardless, something tells me that the inevitable Owens squash isn't as set in stone as everyone might think. I mean, the WWE can't just pick the chalk on everything or else that would get boring. So I'm going to roll with my guys like I always do and pick the upset.

Prediction: Kevin Owens retains





#DORK is Moving!